


Take Me to Church

by Deansbaby11283



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Big Gay Freak Out, F/F, Homophobia, Homophobic Language, Inspired by Music, Inspired by Twist and Shout - gabriel & standbyme, M/M, Original Character Death(s), Sad Ending, Triggers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-05
Updated: 2015-02-20
Packaged: 2018-03-10 13:43:55
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 4
Words: 3,566
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3292490
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Deansbaby11283/pseuds/Deansbaby11283
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After Dean and Sam move in next door to Castiel and his family, friendship turns into something more, but in 1975 Kansas, where AIDS has run wild and gangs to kill Homosexuals have popped up everywhere the love the have might not last as long as forever.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Meeting

**Author's Note:**

> Don't worry I'm not going to forget about my other stories but after watching the Take Me to Church music video I realized that i need to write about this I know lame right? But it wouldn't leave me alone so I had to tell me what you think its my first AU

Kansas 1975-  
It was a hard time for the United States in 1975, the war ended but a new one began, it wasn’t a war against people or countries, it was a war no one can fight, against your own body, mass hysteria is what followed and after they made what they thought was a discovery , that it was about the homosexuals, gangs began rising causing more trouble, Dean and Sam just moved into town a town they hadn’t been to since their parents died, Sam loved his brother really he did and he didn’t mean for the events over the next couple of months to transpire, but everything happens for a reason.   
It all started when they were moving in, Sam and Dean were carrying a couch up the three little stairs to the front door, Dean sweating from carrying the bulk of it, always wanting to protect his brother even from the heaviness of the couch. Castiel saw them moving and went outside to try to help.   
“Excuse me? I just wanted to welcome you to the neighborhood and see if there was anything I could to help”. Dean turned around and almost choked, standing there was a nerdy looking, scrawny kid, with black and hair the most piercing blue eyes you’ve ever seen. Dean cleared his throat and nodded.   
“Yeah kid, uh grab some boxes thank you”. Dean set down the couch and wiped his hands across his forehead. The kid smiled and grabbed three boxes stacked on top of each other Dean groaned in his head as he realized the kid wasn’t as scrawny as he thought him to be.   
He set them down and smiled at him. “I’m Castiel, I live next door with my brothers Luc, Gabriel and Balthazar”. Castiel said with a smile.   
“I’m Dean, this is my little brother Sam, we used to live here when we were little over on Crawford Street”. Dean smiled and Castiel melted, Dean had the most greenest eyes he’s ever seen in his life.   
Castiel helped Sam and Dean get more stuff inside it happened when Castiel picked up the last box, everything was going well laughs, and jokes about Sam’s height, but that last box set off a chain reaction. The bottom of the box came out and the contents spilled across the hardwood of the Living Room “Oh, shit I’m sorry I didn’t mean to-“ Castiel broke off when he seen what spilled out, DD214’s, dog tags, and pictures tons of pictures and letters.   
Castiel’s eyes widened in shock and he looked up to Dean, he stared at the things on the floor and his eyes looked glassy and distant, Sam soon came out of the back room to see what was taking them so long, he froze when he saw what was on the floor and put a hand on his brother’s shoulder causing Dean to jump away.   
“Dean I-“ Castiel began, Dean shook his head and smiled.   
“Hey its fine, just a part of my past that I wish you didn’t know, who knows if your one of those hippies that’s going to throw garbage at me”. Dean said slowly and thoughtfully.   
Castiel shook his head slowly “No of course not war is going to happen and its not anyone’s fault but the government’s those people who threw things at you Dean are cruel”. Dean blinked he hadn’t expected that most people treated him like a piece of trash after ‘nam but not this bespeckled nerdy little weird dude who thought that he would come over and help the new kids in town.   
“Thanks Cas”. Dean said, the two smile at each other and pick up the things off the floor carrying them to Dean’s room.   
That’s when Dean realized this dark haired, blue eyed man, may change everything, there was no way anyone in that house could have predicted these events, no way they could’ve prevented them and most importantly, no way to change them.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another short one most of these will be short hopefully you'll like it!

Castiel found out a lot about the Winchester brother’s those next few weeks, he found out that Sam was in High School still, straight A student, and wanted to be a lawyer, Dean was 19 years old when he was drafted into Vietnam, it messed him up pretty bad and Sam was Freshman when Dean was drafted and wrote to him everyday while he was away the two brothers were super close after that.   
“When Dean came back I thought for sure he was done for, he looked so lost, and in classic Dean manner he didn’t talk about it, he just stayed in his room staring at the wall, he wouldn’t eat when he slept it was for small moments at a time and he always woke up screaming, our half brother Adam went in with him he protected him like he protected me but it wasn’t enough something happened I still can’t get that out of Dean and they got sepretated the whole squad searched as much as they could but he’s MIA they still haven’t found him, Dean never forgave himself”, Sam paused a little in his perusing the shelves at the clothing store they all were at. “He wasn’t the same for a while every now and then he still isn’t the same sometimes but he’s getting better he just needs more time”.   
Castiel nodded and snuck a glance at Dean, he couldn’t imagine it this nice man who protected his baby brother, the man who took the boy next door in under his wing, this strong man who looked like he couldn’t break, wouldn’t break, staring brokenly at the wall, Castiel shook his head when Dean spun around, brilliant smile in place.   
“Hey Sammy what do you think?” Dean asked holding up a bunch of shirts, Sam looked over at his brother and smiled at them.   
“Yeah Dean those are good, can we go know?” Sam asked, Dean rolled his eyes and went to check out.   
Days turned into weeks, and Sam fit in perfectly finding a girlfriend faster than anyone expected and Dean teased him ruthlessly about it, and then one night when Dean asked “Hey Cas so has anything changed since the 50’s?” one night and dinner, Gabriel and Lucifer stopped chewing putting there forks down and glancing out the window, scared that they would hear them.   
“A lot has changed Dean, no one was this scared for one but let’s just say try not to go batting for the other team”. Gabriel said quietly everyone was silent and Dean went back to eating, soon everyone stopped with the heavy questioning and settled into a comfortable silence.   
Castiel and Dean were doing dishes when it happened, everyone had already left and Castiel wanted to help Dean and maybe talk to him too. Castiel tripped, almost face planting but Dean caught him, and then they were close together, chest pressed up against each other and Castiel leapt forward in the heat of the moment their lips touching chastingly at first and then heated when Dean surged forward putting his fingers in Castiel’s hair and lightly pulling, Castiel was making little needy sounds in his throat and Dean smiled into the kiss, until Castiel moaned out his name and remembered the entire conversation with Gabriel and realized what he was doing.   
He pushed Castiel away and gasped, shaking his head Castiel looked wrecked and Dean knew he had to be hard but he was having a big gay freak out in his head, but he wasn’t gay, Dean kept saying in his head there wasn’t anyway that he could like kissing a guy. Castiel’s eyes got wide and he ran out the back door faster than anything Dean’s ever seen before. Just like that the boy next door, became the boy who loved Dean Winchester.


	3. Chapter 3

Dean and Castiel hadn’t spoke in weeks before they heard about the two girls, both were having their Gay freak out, but that evening when they turned on the news everything changed, the famous gang that had been targeting gays had struck again, a young lesbian couple no older than Castiel and Dean had been found beaten to death in the woods with the words “узнать свой урок” written on a sign above them, they were found with their hands still clasped together. Their names were Joanna Beth Harvelle and Charlie Bradbury   
Dean realized what could happen to them if they were found out and couldn’t bare losing Castiel, what if the kiss in the kitchen was found out? What if Castiel got with another guy and was killed for that? Dean rushed over to Castiel’s right as Castiel was rushing to Dean’s, Dean could protect him if he was with Dean no one would get hurt.   
After that, Dean and Castiel kept their relationship a secret not telling anyone, not trusting anyone. Sam brought over his girlfriend, Ruby and they all had dinner together Dean inviting Castiel’s family as well and the pair of them holding hands under the table.   
Castiel started to work over time at the clinic taking his check promptly to the bank and then to a box he hid in the woods by Dean’s meeting place.   
“Cas, what were doing is dangerous”. Dean said one evening while they lay under the stars in a secluded part of the beach. “We just need to leave, get the Impala and just drive, put a thousand miles between us and Lawrence we could do it just leave and never come back”. He said looking over at Castiel.   
“What about Sam?” Castiel asked turning on his side.   
“We’d run it by him, see how he feels and if he has a problem with it, leave him behind”. Dean said simply, Castiel was shocked, Dean would leave his baby brother to defend himself and take care of himself to spend a lifetime with Castiel? It just made him love him more.   
Castiel leapt forward capturing Dean’s lips in his and kissing him passionately loosing himself in Dean, he climbed on top of him and rocked his hips forward causing a moan from Dean, he smiled amazed at the reaction he had on him Castiel carefully unzipped Dean’s pants and pulled out his dick smiling again as Dean hissed at the cold air, Castiel then sunk down licking a strip down Dean’s dick causing Dean’s hips to thrust upwards.   
Castiel wrapped his mouth around Dean’s dick and sucked, bobbing his head and keeping a good rhythm, Dean moaned and rocked his hips before coming long and hard in Castiel’s mouth, they lay together after that talking about nonsense making plans for the future, a future where they didn’t have to keep their love a secret.   
Weeks turned into months and they started being reckless kissing in the house when no one was home, stealing kisses in the open. Looking back at it know Castiel realized he should’ve seen it all coming, but who would’ve thought they would be betrayed like that?   
It was about 3 months after Castiel and Dean got together that Dean met Ruby, and from the moment she walked in dressed in heels, and a smirk smelling of marijuana that Dean realized he didn’t like her at all.   
“Hi Dean, I’m Ruby”. She introduced herself and her voice sounded like ice on his bones, no it froze his marrow, Dean knew that this girl wasn’t any good for his brother he wanted her out of their lives for good. Looking back now Sam realized he should’ve listened to his brother that night instead of fighting.   
“Sam I don’t want you seeing Ruby anymore, she seems dangerous”. Dean said after the girl left.   
“Dean, I love her I’m not leaving just because you don’t like her”. Sam said with venom in his words.   
“Sam what the hell is wrong with you?” Dean asked throwing down the rag he had in his hands.   
Sam fidgeted completely avoiding Dean’s gaze and scratching his arm “Nothing is wrong with me”. He said.   
Dean launched forward and pulled up his brother’s sleeves track marks were up and down his arms, he had been using some drug, whether it be heroin or meth Dean didn’t know but he did know that Ruby wasn’t just his girlfriend Ruby was Sam’s dealer.   
“She’s poison Sam! Look what she’s done to you!” Dean yelled at his little brother Sam’s eyes got furious and he growled at his oldest brother and grabbed the first thing to his left, a vase, and chuckled it at his brother’s head hitting him and making him go down. As Dean lay on the floor in pain and shock he saw Sam grabbing his jacket and opening the door “If you walk out that door, don’t you ever come back”. He yelled after him, Sam flipped him the bird and slammed the door behind him that night Castiel held Dean as he cried.   
A week later Dean heard a knock on the door, Sam stood there with slumped shoulder and tears running down his face “I’m sorry Dean”. Sam said through his tears, Dean just pulled him inside and hugged him with all his might.   
“It’s ok Sammy, your ok”. Castiel excused himself out the back door with a smile. Dean and Castiel still took chances and that’s what led them here.   
It was a week before Sam came back, things were tense between the brothers still but getting better slowly. That is until the night Sam caught them, he didn’t mean to be sneaking he just heard his brother talking and wanted to know what was going on, he peaked his head in the crack in the door and what he saw made him run out the house in shock, Dean and Castiel were kissing heavily little moans coming from Castiel’s throat.   
Sam ran out the house and knocked on the one door he knew he could trust, if Sam knew what was going to happen when he put his fist to that door and knocked he wouldn’t have done it, he would’ve gone and talked to his brother, but he didn’t know and he didn’t stop he told Ruby the entire story of Castiel and Dean and how he was scared for him, scared he would get the disease or get murdered like that poor couple little did he know but a member of that gang was on the other side of that door listening to everything that the young boy was saying.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't hate me! I love you I'm sorry tell me what you think!!!

Dean and Castiel had no idea of the events taking place just a block away and sat together talking about things that really had no chance of ever happening but it still made them happy having a little hope.   
“Dean what happened to Adam?” Castiel asked playing with the hem on Dean’s shirt, and Dean got that far away look in his eyes that said that he was thinking about the past and Castiel hated to bring it up but he wanted to know Dean, all of him even the sad parts.   
“We had a fight, Adam and I, about my Dad and he ran off I chased off after him and I stumbled right into a land mine that I had planted earlier that day, I should’ve remembered it but I didn’t and Adam came out of no where and before I say anything he swept me out of the way and when the land mine blew he blew with it, Sammy thinks he’s MIA but the truth is they never found his body because there isn’t anything left to find”.   
Castiel brought his lips up to Dean kissed him, he blamed himself and Castiel will work until the day he dies to get Dean to believe differently they broke apart and Castiel suddenly had a thought, he wanted to be happy there was only one way he could.   
“Dean I’m going to go home I want you to get a bag together one for you and one for Sam we are leaving and we are going to find a place where we can be happy”. Castiel said getting up and Dean nodded doing the same he ran out the door and walked into his house with purpose getting his stuff together and making a beeline to the place he hid the money.   
Dean grabbed random things and stuffed them in a bag, not noticing what he was putting in he didn’t notice the door close, or if he did he thought it was Sam, or Castiel but it was either of them and suddenly there was a knife at his throat and a voice in his ear asking where Castiel was, Dean stayed silent not saying a single word he drug of into the back property where there was a fire already set up.   
Castiel peddled as fast as he could but stopped when he saw the complete shock on Sam’s face, he stopped and got of the bike fast “What’s going on Sam?” Castiel asked tiredly.   
“Cas, I’m sorry please don’t hate me, I didn’t think I just acted I saw you guys kissing and I panicked I didn’t want either of you to the disease and I told Ruby but I swear I had no idea her brother was involved in those killings I promise but he told his friends and they took him Cas they took my brother and they’re going to kill him and its all going to be my fault”. Sam dissolved in tears but Castiel didn’t have enough time to console the drug addict, he didn’t have time for anything, after not finding the box of money he had stashed he thought maybe Dean got it before he did but know he knows.   
He ran feet hitting pavement hard, not caring that he was in tight pants, not caring that Sam was calling after him all Castiel could do was run and not look back. He caught up to them just in time to see the sickening stomp and here the sickening crack as the gang members took turns stomping Dean’s beautiful face into a pulp. Red and green mixed as Dean’s blood came out of every body surface and spilled into the grass. With every stomp more and more blood came and Castiel couldn’t look away he watched as the man he loved died on the ground.   
Sam saw the look of pure sadness on Castiel’s face and broke down again he couldn’t do it and in a moment of what some would call weakness he went to Dean’s safe, cracker it open like he was taught by his dad and picked up the colt that was resting, loaded , inside he brought the trigger to his mouth and whispered a sorry to his brother, pulled the trigger and fell on the floor dead.   
Castiel felt numb, he felt the twinges of sadness but right now he had two things on his mind and neither of those were crying, he walked purposely right up to Ruby’s door, he knocked hard and waited calmly, eerily, his blue eyes flashing angrily, when Ruby answered the door she took in a breath but Castiel didn’t let her speak, he was on her in matter of seconds his fists connected with her face in sastifying crunches, for every stomp those men did to Dean he was going to punch Ruby three times harder he wanted to see the light leave her eyes just as the light left Dean’s this wasn’t revenge to Castiel this was a long time coming, when he sastified that she was gone he dropped her to the floor and made his way back out the door to the house he shared his fisr everything with Dean, his first kiss, his first time making love , and his first heartbreak.   
“First and last”. Castiel said silently. He walked into the house saw Sam’s lifeless body and turned around picking up a notepad and pen from Sam’s room and he began to right to the tune of “Love me Tender” by Elvis.   
Dear Dean,   
After so much time together it felt like a few weeks, and it seemed like it was over too soon, you were such a bright spot in my life and I am so grateful you chose to spend the last part of your life with me, we were happy and as much as I wish that were was a is it will never come to pass Dean, I can’t live without you, I need you. Dean you have humor, you’re the giggle at a funeral I should’ve worshipped you sooner, if the heaven’s ever did speak you were the last true mouth piece, you heard them say we were born sick you used to tell me worship in the bedroom. I may have been born sick but I love it. I love you. And when my goal is finshed the only heaven I’ll be sent to is when I’m alone with you. There was no sweeter innocence then our gentle sin, these are the last words I’ll ever write and I hope that when this is finshed I’ll meet you in wherever we may go.   
Love with my last breath,   
Castiel  
Castiel took the gun from Sam’s lifeless form and put the barrel in his mouth he closed his eyes and whispered one last I love you and pulled the trigger.


End file.
